Nicole's Birth Story

Pregnancy

My husband and I found out we were pregnant on Valentine’s Day after our dinner date - Quinton suspected I was pregnant before I did. We took two tests once we got home and both were positive! We were over the moon! We sat on the kitchen floor for hours talking about what our future may entail. I knew immediately I did not want a hospital birth. We did a lot of research on our options and The Midwife Center aligned perfectly with our ideals and values surrounding pregnancy and labor/delivery. We were blown away by the supportive care we received at our prenatal appointments. Our questions and concerns were met with care, extensive knowledge and reassurance.

Going Into Labor

Thursday, October 23, I woke up at 5 in the morning after a night of painful menstrual-like cramps to find my bloody show. I was 2 days past my due date and had myself convinced for the last few weeks that this baby would come early despite being told first time moms typically go over due. My 41 week appointment with additional tests was scheduled and I was hopeful we wouldn’t need it. Seeing my bloody show, I knew labor was right around the corner and was encouraged by the fact we would meet our baby soon.

My contractions started within a half an hour of my show and they were intense but sporadic - ranging from 10 minutes apart to 5 minutes apart. The intensity took me by surprise, as everything I had learned made it seem like the contractions would start slow and build over time. That pattern continued all day as well as my bleeding. I phoned the midwife on call to check that my bleeding was normal and Jessie assured me that we were still safe to labor at home until things progressed. Night time rolled around and my contractions increased in intensity - I was finding it difficult to cope through them. I held a tight grip on my birthing comb and tried to manage my breathing. These contractions were still just 5 minutes apart or longer but the pain was shocking - I started getting the adrenaline shakes. Sleep was not possible for me that night - aside from not coping with contractions well, my anxiety was creeping in.

Friday morning we decided to call the midwife again as my bleeding was still heavy and wanted to double check that this was a normal function of labor - I also wanted to update her on my contractions and the previous night. She told us we are still fine to labor at home but I should really try to eat and rest. My contractions get even more intense this day - most contractions lasting well over a minute and some over 3 minutes. I started facing the reality of hitting my breaking point and altering my birth plans. My goal was to have an unmedicated vaginal birth at The Midwife Center but I was beginning to consider going to a hospital to receive an epidural because I was physically and mentally exhausted.

Quinton and I discussed our options Friday morning and I prematurely grieved the labor that I wanted but didn’t believe I was strong enough to pursue. Regardless, we needed to prioritize rest so I ate as much as I could stomach and tried to relax enough to sleep between my contractions. This tiring pattern of inconsistent but intense contractions continued into the evening and I knew I could not handle another night of not sleeping. I called my mom for support and guidance and she advised I phone the midwife and update her on everything.

Arriving at The Midwife Center

Theresa was the midwife on call that night and agreed we were at a point where we needed to intervene on this labor - she had us meet her at The Midwife Center at 8:30pm. Once we arrived, we met the nurse, Lily, and she showed us to our birthing space, the Mountain Room. We spoke with Theresa and Lily about all of the symptoms and lack of sleep - about 3 hours in the last 36 hours. Theresa checked me and I was a tight 4cm dilated and 70% effaced so my body was still in early labor. After I was checked, Theresa presented our options. We could do nothing and see how my labor progressed at The Midwife Center, we could try to jumpstart labor with castor oil and nipple stimulation, we could transfer to the hospital to receive an epidural for rest and then be put on pitocin, or I could receive morphine at The Midwife Center to try and help me rest between contractions. We all agreed I needed to prioritize rest if my goal was a vaginal delivery, and I still wanted to honor my birth plan of delivering at The Midwife Center so we opted to receive morphine.

Theresa was so validating and made me feel like my dream birth was still achievable after I had mentally begun to loosen my grip on that dream. Lily checked the baby’s heartbeat during a contraction and it was a steady 150bpm. The morphine was administered around 10:30pm and although it didn’t diminish the pain of my contractions, it did relieve me of anxiety enough where I was able to sleep during the 10 minutes between contractions and manage my breath better. Lily and Theresa would intermittently check on me and the baby, but around 4:30am Saturday we could tell my contractions were getting closer together and much more intense.

Theresa listened to the baby’s heartbeat through 4 contractions and confirmed I was in active labor at 5:00am. Quinton called my parents to head over and I moved from the bed to the shower. I sat on a birthing ball in the shower with one stream hitting my back and the handheld hitting my stomach. The contractions began taking my breath away by the time my parents arrived but I maintained my down breathing which helped ground me. My dad checked in on me before heading to our house to keep an eye on our dogs and my mom stuck around to help support Quinton and I.

The nurse and midwife switched shifts at 7:00am and Jessie and Ashley were taking over. Quinton attended all but one of my prenatal appointments and the one he missed was the one where I met Jessie. I remember coming home and telling him how much I loved Jessie and hoped she would be the one to deliver our baby so it truly was kismet when Theresa told me Jessie was taking over for her.

The shower was the only place that felt comfortable for a while. I tried laboring on the toilet and on the bed and immediately got back in the shower. Things really started progressing around 8:00am - I asked for the birthing tub to be filled. Once I got in the tub, my contractions changed. I was in transition and said multiple times “I can’t do this anymore.” I could feel my body wanting to push and my vocalizations reflected that. Jessie said my contractions are sounding different and asked to check me. I told her if I’m not at a place where I can start pushing, I didn’t know if I could continue on. Thankfully after the check around 8:30am she confirmed we were ready to push.

I didn’t last long in the tub as I kept floating during contractions and felt like I didn’t have much control over my body. We moved to the bed around 8:45am and this is where my water broke. I labored on my knees leaning on an inflatable prop for a while and tried side lying. We then moved back to the toilet and Ashley and Jessie coached me on where to direct my breath while pushing.

After feeling a bit more confident in my pushing, we moved back to the bed. I pushed kneeling again. We realized I was making the most progress while pushing on my back - shocking! My contractions started to slow down, which put quite a damper on baby’s descent. Quinton stimulated my breasts to encourage quicker contractions. I pushed as much as I could during each contraction but by this time my body was exhausted. It was beginning to feel like I could not finish the job - I remember Jessie telling me around 11:00am that if I didn’t birth this baby in an hour we would have to discuss other options. I work best under pressure so this was a great motivator for me! I was offered an episiotomy but refused.

At 11:26am, baby’s head was visible and at 11:58am our baby was born! Baby’s shoulders were easily delivered and baby was immediately placed on my belly. Quinton announced “we have a baby boy!” and there were happy tears all around. We named him Ira Robert Paul and he is the most beautiful baby boy I’ve ever seen. My husband never left my side and from the moment my mom arrived she stuck by me - I had such a wonderful support system.

My placenta partially detached and I began hemorrhaging. Jessie carefully manually removed my placenta and it was heart shaped! Jessie and Ashley did such a wonderful job of handling a scary situation. I lost quite a large amount of blood but they remained calm and steady when things were rather uncertain. Ultimately they were able to manage my bleeding at the birthing center!

Reflections

I remember being in shock that I was able to deliver my baby at The Midwife Center after 55 hours of labor with 3 hours of pushing. I stuck to my plan despite my labor not going the way I expected it to (quite silly of me to have expectations in the first place). Each pregnancy is unique to that person, and The Midwife Center honors that. Their focus of care is catered to the individual instead of a one size fits all approach. Most of all, I felt respected in my decisions by the midwives and nurses. I feel so empowered by my birth and proud of myself and my baby. He remained so strong during a long, tough labor and allowed me to birth in the space I dreamt of.

I can’t say enough about the care and support I received from Theresa, Lily, Jessie and Ashley. Theresa and Lily were such a calming presence to walk into and I felt so validated in each thought and feeling I had. When it was go time, Jessie and Ashley were my biggest cheerleaders. I would not have been able to accomplish this birth without all of them. It truly felt like the stars perfectly aligned for these strong women to be present with me at the exact times they were by my side.

We are soaking in all the newborn cuddles and continue to be amazed by the support we are receiving from The Midwife Center. We’ve fully utilized the lactation support available and notice major differences in our breastfeeding journey after these visits. We aren’t in any rush to have more children, but I know without a doubt we will receive care from The Midwife Center with the goal of delivering there as well. Seeing all of our names up on that chalkboard in the lobby instills such a sense of pride in us.

Nicole resting with her baby after birth. Her husband is massaging her head.